Saturday, September 12, 2015

Six SHOCKING Examples Of Brand New Band Jr Jr Stealing From Indie-Pop Legend Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr

Last week I discovered the band Jr Jr and fell in love instantly. I was listening to them all the time. I mean, how often do you find a band that's good at beep-booping and guitar?  And I was so excited for their album coming out on September, 25th! But then I realized how similar it sounded to my other favorite band, Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr. That's when it hit me, and boy was I floored. Jr Jr stole all of their songs! And even worse Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr isn't even on spotify or iTunes anymore, which must mean they were so hurt by this that they quit music altogether! I decided to compile this list of all the times Jr Jr ripped off Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr. 

1. Their Sound!

Just listen to that! Those beep-boops and guitars and heart melting guitars are classic Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr. They literally invented that music style. I tried to email Jr Jr's college professors to get them expelled for plagiarism, but kept coming back as some sort of mailer-daemon, which sounds to me like Jr Jr is also tied up in Satanism. I'm telling you, they are pure evil. 
What the Hell, Jr Jr?

2. Their Lyrics!

This is where the theft starts to get blatant. Jr Jr is stealing the words straight from Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr songs!

 Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr (original)                                                                Jr Jr (stolen)

Dale Ain't Too Happy Right Now

3. Their Album Covers!
Look at these side by side comparisons and tell me they aren't stolen! They just crudely photoshopped their names on! Jr Jr even stole the font!

Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr (orginal)                                                                Jr Jr (fake)

You think I don't see what you're doing, boy?

4. Their Name!

They thought they could away with something so heinous as stealing the name of an indie darling like Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr, but I noticed. I am calling you out, sickos. I am tracking you down and bringing you to justice. Just wait and see. 
You're getting what's coming to ya, Jr Jr

5. Their Band Members!

Here is where it gets truly SHOCKING! Jr Jr wasn't content just leeching off of the genius that Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr worked so hard to cultivate. They could have just stolen their sound, lyrics, albums, and their name and gotten by, but no. They had to steal the band members themselves. I don't know what kind of held-at-gunpoint stuff is going on here, but somehow Jr Jr is forcing them to perform like some sad group of organ grinder monkeys. 

Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on Jr Jr. At least they steal from the best. And now that Dale Earnhardt Jr Jr doesn't exist anymore, where else will I get my beep-boop/guitar/dreamy vocals that I love so much? I hate myself for it, but I might have to buy their new album on September, 25th. I hope the cashier accepts tear soaked bills. 

 I guess if you can't beat em, join em.

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